Write 31 Days: Being Me: Forgiveness

Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do. Yet, we are called to forgive because God forgave us. It's still hard. After all we are human and we are messed up. Being a stepmom and showing forgiveness your husband's ex is at the top of the list of hard things to do. She probably is hurting or angering your husband on a regular basis and making life difficult. You might even feel like she is selfish and not putting your stepchild first. She might make you mad and you might want to say mean … [Read more...]

How to Have Less Worry and More Peace

One of my very first blog posts back in May 2013 was about spring break. It's funny how much things have changed in those few short years between then and now. I remember how worried I was then. How much I stressed about this child that I loved so much, and I still do, but had so little control over. Do you ever control your children? Biological or step? No, we really don't. But back then I worried so much for his safety - physical, emotional and spiritual. I hated that time away from us … [Read more...]

Giving Grace Even When Kids are Grumpy

Do you ever just feel grumpy? Do you forget to say please and thank you? Do you snap at the people you love? Confession: I do. Why is it then when the teenager is grumpy I get so bent out of shape about it? I don't like feeling this way. I need to ask God to change my heart. To help me give T grace. Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. James 1:19 Rather than get frustrated when he is grumpy, I should listen … [Read more...]

Encouragement for Stepmoms (Thankfulness)

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever. Psalm 136:1 Whether you know it or your stepkid knows it you're one of the mosy influential people in his life. Since you're reading a blog about encouragement for stepmoms I'm going to bet that you care deeply for your stepkid. Are you thankful for him? Does he know that? Are you thankful for God's goodness and gave? Does your stepkid know that? Are you being a good model of giving thanks to God. Each night as I pray … [Read more...]

Encouragement for Stepmoms (School)

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Colossians 3:23-24 All throughout elementary school we'd hear how great T was at participating and answering questions when asked but that he always needed to be reminded to get his work out or stay on task. One year his long time neighbor was purposely sat next to him in class to … [Read more...]

Encouragement for Stepmoms (Trust)

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me... Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:1, 27 My husband and I parent very differently than his ex-wife. She has more of a free spirit style and we are more structured. This is hard to write without feeling like I'm judging or condemning. Basically sometimes T is allowed to do things that I feel may … [Read more...]

Rerun Tuesday: Weary Stepmom

Last year I wrote the words below and as I re-read them I'm thinking about how they apply to being any kind of parent - step, biological it doesn't matter. If you are a mom God made you for this. There will be days when yo are touted but don't grow weary. Lean into God and remember... God has a plan and you being a stepmom is part of it. God created me for this. He made me to be a stepmom to T. To be another mom for him. I’m messing up, yes. And I always will because I am human, but I am not … [Read more...]

Encouragement for Stepmoms (Consistent)

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9 You hear how important being consistent with your child is. But it's not easy, is it? It's hard to be consistent with bedtimes, eating healthily and consequences when you're running from homework to the ball field and trying to feed your kiddo at some point before shower and bed. And what if your kid only lives with you part-time? Being consistent while parenting isn't … [Read more...]

Encouragement for Stepmoms (He is Near)

 God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. Acts 17:27 Being a stepmom can be a lonely place. You're a mom but you don't have the same rights as a bio mom and often your child feels conflict about loving you or having a relationship with you because it's seen as a betrayal to the bio mom. It's hard to express how that feels. Your hubby can try to understand and be empathetic but you still feel alone. Can you … [Read more...]

Rerun Tuesday: Encouragement

I wrote this post almost two years ago for the same reason I write most posts: because it's what I need to hear myself! One of our biggest worries and fears as moms/stepmoms is that we might be messing up our kids. We question our decisions and actions. I feel like as stepmoms we might second guess ourselves even more. As I wrote in the post from the past: Mamas, you are not messing up your kids. You may mess up now and again but you are not messing up your kids. You are human. You will … [Read more...]