Rerun Tuesday: Down Time

From the archives: Down Time   Why is it that it can be so much easier to write about the struggles than it is to write about the good times? Well, I'm going to be intentional in recognizing the good times. Like today, right now T and I are relaxing, hanging out together. I'm reading (and writing this) and he is playing dragonvale, telling me all about his dragons and people visiting his island. I love this time together.   Or last night, my parents took T and me to … [Read more...]

Rerun Tuesday: No Expectations

From the archives: No Expectations We had several outstanding requests to T's mom regarding his poor grades and plans for the summer. After a couple days of not hearing back I thought for sure her response(s) either would a) never come or b) be negative. I even resorted to checking my hubby's email several times during my workday looking for and expecting the worst. I totally ignored that small voice that said even if you get a response what can you do about it now while you are at … [Read more...]

Sleep

I just want to sleep. Honestly having a newborn is harder than being pregnant or even labor and delivery. And our newborn is a good baby. I just can't do this sleep for only two or three hours at a time thing. I mean I can and I will for as long as I have to but I feel like I can't. I feel like I just need to sleep for an entire day but there is a little man who needs me. My days consist of trying to sleep when I can, changing diapers, pumping milk, feeding the baby, repeat. Oh and trying … [Read more...]

Just Keep on Showing Love

It was baseball picture day and T was late but made it in time. M and I were there because he wanted to get group photos after the pro photos were done. I made fun of M and called him cheap but really it's genius. We capture the boys personalities much more than a standard group shot can. Anyway as we were all leaving I was standing on the sidewalk waiting to say hi to T. He was going to walk right by me pretending never seeing me on the way to his mom's car. I've been his stepmom for ten … [Read more...]

Allowing God to Direct Me

The other night I had a dream about T. He was literally calling out to us for help but we could do nothing because of something to do with his mom. I'm sure this is just me worrying but I also wonder if this is an unconscious need of his and not just mine? If that is the case, how do we help him? Immediately after I woke up I journaled a prayer to God and this verse came to me... Psalm 25:4-5 (NIV) 4 Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. 5 Guide me in your truth and teach … [Read more...]

Expecting

When we told T that he was going to be a big brother we had no idea what his reaction would be. There's going to be a big age difference between these two siblings. We hoped he would be excited of course. We gave him a t-shirt that read "if you <picture of mustache> I'm the big brother" (mustache = must ask - get it? ha!) and a teeny-tiny onesie that read "I <3 my big brother." He was smiling when he saw that. We went away a few days later for a long weekend as a family and he would … [Read more...]

Distance Between Us

Why does it feel like there is this great divide between us? Why do I feel like my boy pushes me away? Does he feel like I do that too? He's 14 now and a freshman in high school. When did that happen?! When I first see T after not having seen him for a week, I feel on guard. I don't know which boy to expect... the funny, talkative one or the quiet, brooding one. I remember being a teen and having all of these emotions I didn't know what to do with. I'd feel happy one minute and so down the next. … [Read more...]

Summer to do List

School is almost out for us. One more week to go! I need/want to talk about summer schedules and scheduling challenges but right now I just want to create summer bucket list. I also love this idea from faithgateway.com of creating a summer picture book ( I think I might post some of these to instagram so watch for that). So, without further ado.... Top Ten Must-Do's this Summer for the Being Stepmom Family 1. Go to Six Flags (T and I have season passes and I want to get my money's … [Read more...]

Grateful {part two}

I'm feeling so grateful right now. Thankful for all the Lord has given my family. I'm feeling guilty for all of the time I've spent this past week stewing over the little things and being angry at others. My day job is working at a nonprofit that provides food to people in need. This Mother's Day I had a voice mail on my cell phone from a guy who wanted help feeding his family. I wasn't sure I was going to call him back. I wasn't at my computer didn't know if I could find the resource … [Read more...]

This is Me

Whew, where do I even begin. How about at the beginning. (Insert nervous laugh here.) When I started this blog I was scared. I wanted to share my story but I wasn't sure how fair that was to the people in my story. Especially the people that maybe aren't revealed in a favorable light in my story. And so I chose to use a nom de plume. I was afraid if I used my real name people might be hurt or offended. I want so badly to be an encouragement here but I am human and I get frustrated by other … [Read more...]