No Spend November Day Four

No Spend November Day Four I'm  literally sitting outside Target right now. About to go in and get a couple of things for my work and I need to get a wedding present. I also need — no want — new shoes for the wedding however it is not with in my No Spend November rules. I’m saying a quick prayer that the temptation does not overtake me. Still not feeling so great about me not spending or rather the spending I’ve been doing. I sent two birthday cards yesterday. Not a lot of money but I did spend … [Read more...]

Thank you, Amazon Prime.

No Spend November Day Three Two packages arrived yesterday in the mail: a suitcase and a Christmas gift. Thank you, Amazon Prime. Both I ordered before No Spend November commenced. I also need to give a coworker money for a joint baby shower gift. I'm not feeling so good about my No Spend November progress. I will say I did decide to toss a school fundraiser order form and Scholastic book order even though I wanted to purchase something from both. I decided neither fit into my criteria for … [Read more...]

Goodbye daily sales ads and Amazon wishlist to the rescue

No Spend November Day Two I started unsubscribing from the millions of mailing lists I'm on so I can stop being tempted by the daily sales ads. My theory is if I need to buy something I can sign up for the mailing list again to see what sales are happening or just use something like Ebates to look for deals. If I'm not getting the emails telling me about things I never knew I needed before I should, in theory, spend less money. I think I'm going to try to unsubscribe from about five lists a … [Read more...]

I worked all day and didn’t shop on Amazon

No Spend November Day One Today started off fantastic! I packed my lunch, I voted, I got the little to preschool, all before going to work. I worked all day and didn't shop on Amazon so that was good. I did spend money to get my haircut but the appointment had already been made. And this amazing book -- Homebody: A Guide To Creating Spaces You Never Want to Leave by Joanna Gaines -- came in the mail today which I had pre-ordered and paid for back in September so that doesn't count as … [Read more...]

No Spend November

I need your help. I need you to hold me accountable. This November I'm declaring "No Spend November." My spending is a bit out of control and I'm hurting my family. We can't grow our savings because I'm spending outside our budget. Here's my "No Spend November" rules: No spending money outside bills, groceries, and gas No eating out because I failed to plan and make lunch ahead of time (eating out for special occasions will be ok) No Amazon! No clothes shopping for me and hubby … [Read more...]

3 Ways to Make Communication with “The Mom” Easier

I would guess that every stepmom and her husband have had at least one frustrating communication experience with the kids' mom. I remember, years ago when we were waiting for a response from T's mom and how frustrated I was. Days went by and not a word. I've already had a fight with her going on in my head... "Don't you want to talk about this important thing?!" I had what she would say and my clever responses played out. I was mad. The more I thought about it, the madder I got and the real … [Read more...]

Can you have a friendly stepmom-biomom relationship?

As 8th graduation was nearing for T, I was pinning graduation party ideas. I thought we could even do something with his "other" family. I was picturing a big group of people who all loved T eating pizza together, being friendly and celebrating him. That's not what happened. M and I had dinner alone after the graduation. T's mom never got back to me about doing something together. We later learned that she took him out to pizza herself. We were not included and that hurt. We may have even shed … [Read more...]

God is with me

I felt like there was an elephant sitting on my chest and I just couldn't even breathe. I had to walk out of the counseling session because I was about to cry or scream or do something. I don't even know. I was so angry and just did not understand why this was all happening. My husband and I were with my stepson and his biomom at a counseling session and I can't go into details - I don't want to go into details - but it was just all so wrong. I was hurt and I was angry for myself, for my … [Read more...]

Regrets

I can't remember what the situation was that made me so angry but I screamed at her in the middle of swim practice. Y'all I don't do things like that. I cannot remember why or what she did. Thankfully we weren't near anybody else. I was shaking with furry and shouted at her telling her what was on my mind. I truly don't have many regrets in life. I feel like all of my mistakes are really just opportunities that I learn from and made me who I am by making me stronger. I do have maybe one … [Read more...]

What I would tell my young stepmom self

I remember this time when I was a young stepmom being at back-to-school night. Without going into all the gory details the bottom line is I pretty much yelled at the bio-mom for her choices for my stepson's lunch. I could say that she started it and she may have but that doesn't really matter. What matters is how angry I felt. I knew I was right and she was wrong and I just couldn't understand why she couldn't see that. How come she couldn't understand that what she was choosing to feed my … [Read more...]